wah wah

Here's the thing about loss. Sometimes you don't know it happens until a long time after, so you feel like you shouldn't be sad (after all, you didn't notice it for some time), but you feel sad all the same. Yup, that's me.

I just found out that all my pictures are gone. All photos from high school and 90% of college are poof! gone. It happened when Amos (the boyfriend) was reformatting my old, brick of a computer. He transferred all my pictures & documents to an external hard drive (and I saw them the week before, so at one point they were there), but now they aren't. At least the pictures... if I want my research paper from Accounting Information Systems, well that's still available. Thanks Universe.

Darn it. Like really, really darn it. I'm sad, sad about all the photos I wish I still had. That's the funny thing about stuff -- you end up getting attached. I'm trying to keep it in perspective and remember that in the end, I can always lift shots from Facebook albums. (Gaw, that's a bit depressing all on its own.)

I thought I would feel like flipping off the universe, but instead I just want to sit and be quiet for awhile. Mourn the loss with dignity.

ps - the above is an artsy photo that the boy took. he was my photographer this afternoon, and I think they turned out great. I'll share more soon.